Week 14’s Cold Hard Locks never went up as Matty D sustained some ankle damage after the Ugly Sweater Run (goddamn free Sam Adams and my short-short running shorts!) But he took the week (as usual) going 12-4 as the G-Man took the Seahawks instead of the 49ers (amateur) and went 11-5.  And so I look to further my lead this week with another stellar performance in the only Cold Hard Locks to take to Vegas and put it all on black…

Season record:

Matty D – 68-42

G-Man – 62-48

 

Matty D is 6-1-1 in the weekly challenge. Is this even fair?

The battle continues in the Thunderdome…

NFL Week 15 Cold Hard Locks

(Underlined denotes home team. G-Man and Matty D have same picks unless otherwise noted.)

(P.S. We both picked the Broncos on Thursday Night so yeah)

Redskins over Falcons – 24 to 17

The Falcons aren’t good and neither are the Redskins. Both these teams were in much different places last season. But Kirk Cousins is going to spark this dormant offense and lead the ‘Skins into and out of the Georgia Dome with a rare victory. St. Louis fans are going to be pissed as they see their draft choice lose value and RGIII is still just pissed. Cousins will toss at least two TDs as he shops his ability for the trade market.

G-Man – Falcons

 

Buccaneers over 49ers – 20 to 17

These Bucs are playing good football right now. The 49ers have to travel across the country after a grueling and physical win against arch-rival Seattle and play a very underrated defense and a confidant young quarterback. Sounds like an upset special to me. Not solid on Kaepernick yet and Coach Harbaugh might be thinking about that Texas job a little bit. Them 49ers are gonna get swash-buckled right out of the playoffs if they aren’t careful.

G-Man – 49ers

 

Seahawks over Giants – 28 to 6

Sherman and his “swag” defense aren’t too happy about last week’s lost and neither is Russell Wilson so look for the Seahawks to paste the Giants and stay ahead of the Saints for the #1 seed. Wilson will toss two, Lynch will run for two, and the Giants won’t even find the endzone.

 

Patriots over Dolphins – 17 to 14

Gronk is gone, but Vereen has quietly returned. There is no replacement for Gronkowski for Brady, but the emergence of Julian Edelman and the return of satellite-back Vereen will allow Brady to keep humming. All you have to do is win, statistics be damned, and the Patriots hold on to the #1 seed after the Broncos lose. Do you trust Manning more than Brady in Foxboro in January? Every game is now a must win for New England as the Dolphins see their playoff hopes slip away.

 

Jaguars over Bills – 23 to 20 (OT)

Two teams without playoff hopes smashing heads in the warmth. Each team has atrocious offense, but Gus Bradley has his boys ready to play somehow as they ride a 3 game winning streak. No more Tebow or Bridgewater banners now! Bradley for governor of Florida!

 

Eagles over Vikings – 35 to 17

Potentially without Peterson or Toby Gehart, and playing one of the hottest teams in the NFL? The Purple People Eaters stand little chance. The Vikings can run the football, but the Eagles can stop it quite well. Oh and McCoy, Jackson, and Foles will have little trouble. The only chance for Minnesota is the electric Cordarrelle Patterson, but he is very boom-or-bust. Eagles get the win, and with a Cowboys loss and a 49ers loss, they inch closer to a surprising playoff berth.

 

Colts over Texans – 14 to 13

Why so close? The Texans are the worst team in football and the Colts are division leaders. True and true, but the Texans still have talent and are bound to win at some point. But the Colts are at home and Andrew Luck won’t let them lose this one. The march for Bridgewater continues in Houston.

 

Bears over Browns – 24 to 21

The Bears get Cutler back, is that a good thing? Regardless of the QB, Marshall and Jeffrey are the league’s best (healthy) duo at wide-out and will prove just a little too much for Josh Gordon and the Dawg Pound. DA BEARS

 

Chiefs over Raiders – 28 to 13

The Chiefs are still good and Denver doesn’t look so invisible anymore. Charles will have a nice day, the defensive will add a touchdown, and the Raiders will look overmatched. Enough said.

 

Panthers over Jets – 24 to 6

Geno Smith meet Luke Keuchly.

 

Packers over Cowboys – 42 to 35

I’m calling this one. Matt Flynn will get another big contract from this game. The Cowboys look like the defenses Baylor torched this year in college. Packers are trying to stay in the division race while the Cowboys are giving 100% effort in to choking again. Flynn throws for 4, Lacy runs for 2, and Romo still loses in December even with 5 touchdown passes.

G-Man – Cowboys

 

Cardinals over Titans – 17 to 13

There is turmoil in Tennessee with reports of Chris Johnson on the way out, Locker not getting another contract, and the head coach about to be shown the door. The Cardinals did lose Defensive Rookie of the Year candidate Tyrann Mathieu and that can’t be overlooked, but the Cardinals are good enough to keep winning, even if they don’t make the playoffs.

 

Saints over Rams – 38 to 17

Yes the Saints are playing on the road, but in a dome. That can’t be forgotten. So look for Brees and Co. to have a field day and for the Rams to keep struggling, even if Robert Quinn rudely introduces himself to Mr. Brees 3 times.

 

Steelers over Bengals – 24 to 21

One team is desperate to hang around the race while the other is a lock to get in. Big Ben is playing at home and will match his desperate style to this desperate game throwing 3 TD passes and pushing the Steelers over divisional foe Cincinnati.

G-Man – Bengals

 

Lions over Ravens – 28 to 24

I want to pick the Ravens here as they are playing great football. But with the Bears and Packers nipping at their heals and rookie safety Matt Elam calling out Megatron, Stafford, Johnson, and Bush will provide the necessary ingredients for a huge late-season win. Megatron will break the NFL single game passing yards record on a big catch late in the 4^th that will result in him stiff-arming Elam and reaching for the endzone. Eat your humble pie rookie, Megatron has no equal.

 

From the Desk of the G-Man –

 

PLAYOFF SCENARIOS

NFC – Clinchers

The Panthers are in with a win AND losses by the Cardinals AND 49ers AND EITHER the Cowboys OR the Eagles

The Saints are in with a win OR losses by the Cardinals AND 49ers AND EITHER the Cowboys OR the Eagles

The 49ers are in with a win AND losses by the Cardinals AND EITHER the Cowboys OR the Eagles

The Seahawks clinch the NFC West and a first-round bye with a win AND a 49ers loss AND IF the Saints lose, the Seahawks clinch home-field advantage

Eliminators

The Packers are out with a loss OR wins by both the Panthers AND 49ers

AFC – Clinchers

The Bengals clinch a playoff birth with a win AND a Dolphins loss.

The Bengals clinch the AFC North with a win AND a Ravens loss.

The Chiefs are in with a win OR a loss by the Dolphins OR a loss by the Ravens

The Patriots clinch a playoff birth with a win OR a loss by the Ravens

The Patriots clinch the AFC East with a win

Eliminators

The Bills are out with a loss OR a win by the Ravens OR the Dolphins

The Browns are out with a loss OR a win by the Ravens OR the Dolphins

The Jaguars are out with a loss OR a win by the Ravens OR the Dolphins

The Raiders are out with a loss OR a win by the Ravens OR the Dolphins

The Steelers are out with a loss AND a win by the Ravens OR the Dolphins

The Titans are out with a loss AND a win by the Ravens OR the Dolphins

GO BIRDS!

LONG LIVE THE THUNDERDOME!!!